Today and Everyday is Valentines’ Day

Mother Teresa said that “Kind words can be short and easy to speak but their echoes are truly endless.” Make sure you tell the people that matter most to you how you really feel about them. Don’t wait for Valentines’ Day.

Take a piece of paper and fold it in half or take one of the many cards you received from charities in the mail.  Decorate it with stickers, glue, fabric, glitter, markers or whatever you can find. On the inside of the card write at least three things that you are proud of or that make you special.  Then make one for your spouse, children, co-worker or someone else that you care about and tell them why you think they are special. If you need a little a little help here is a partial list of I am/ you are special, wonderful and unique because….

I find ways to express myself creatively	you care about the environment
I am honest	you are patient
I am sensitive to others feelings	you are a visionary
I admit when I am wrong	you work really hard
I am a good listener	you take care of your parents
I am open to new ideas	you help around the house
I am true to myself	you always see the good in everyone

Please share three things that make you special and unique.

The Truth of the Matter

My friend Lisa Rosenthal began the Vet Art Project. The Vet Art Project provides opportunities for veterans and their families to work in collaboration with artists to create art about war and service, and to foster discussion about how war and service affect us all.

They are currently offering a workshop on storytelling based on the work of author Tim O’Brien, a Viet Nam Veteran. He writes on his experiences of war and how it impacts servicemen. In the chapter "How to Tell a True War Story" in The Things They Carried, O'Brien suggests there are two ways to tell a story, "story-truth" (the truth of fiction) and "happening-truth" (the truth of fact or occurrence), writing that "story-truth is sometimes truer than happening-truth." In other words, there is an emotional truth that comes from our personal experiences and can feel “truer” than the factual details.

 How do we tell someone the unthinkable? How do we describe what we have no words for? I believe we all have to find a way to share our wounded stories and stand in our power if we want to heal our past. Personally, I have written fairy tales and created a video.

Please share with me how you have told your story? How did sharing your truth change you and the people around you?

Three Letter Word that can Change your Life

After 12 years of talk therapy I felt like I hit a wall. I was stuck. I kept replaying the same story over and over in my head and my life. No matter how I was surviving that was all I was doing. I kept thinking there had to be more. I wanted joy, happiness and not just for a moment every six months.

So I began a 25 year journey of healing. I engaged in energy work, anger work, 12 step work, body work. I traveled the world looking for healers and shamans. I was a work shop junkie. Over the years I have read a 1000 self help books, and for most of them, I answered the questions at the end of each chapter. I had journals everywhere. It helped tremendously to write, but my biggest transformation came from ART.

I finally found a way to ACCESS the pain I felt and had no words for. I could RELEASE the negative voices of shame and guilt I carried in my head and heart. Ultimately I could TRANSFORM the wounds of the past into the gifts of today.

Probably about now you are saying I am not creative. I can’t draw. If you can hold a crayon then you can do ART. It is really simple. Remember when you just spent time coloring in a coloring book, made mud pies or did doodles on the sidewalk with chalk. Allow yourself to remember the sense of play and wonder you once had.

 Put on your favorite music. Tape a piece of paper down on the table. Then pick out two crayons. Put one in your non-dominant hand, close your eyes and begin to scribble. Remember you can’t do this wrong. After a couple minutes put down the one color and do it again with the second color. After another minute pick up one crayon in each hand and scribble. Don’t peak!  When you are ready, open your eyes and color with any crayon that pleases you. Do this for at least ten minutes and you will notice you are breathing deeper. Your blood pressure will come down and you will feel more relaxed and at peace.

As I said before ART can change your life, maybe even save it.

Rae Luskin is an author, artist, teacher and activist. Known as the “Healed Heart” expert, she nurtures self-worth, resilience, healing and social change through creative expression. She is available for workshops, keynotes, and mentoring. To find out more go to www.raeluskin.net. If you are interested in working with Rae, apply now for a free discovery session under the gifts tab or write me at rae@raeluskin.net

You Have the Power

School will begin soon and it is time to have those discussions about bus safety, drop and roll, stranger danger. Did you know that one in four girls and one in six boys are sexually abused by the time they are 18?  Did you know that 85% of the time the child knows and trusts the abuser?

If you want to create a safe place for your children then you must educate yourself! 

1.     Learn the facts about child abuse. It can happen in any religious, ethnic or economic group.

2.     Minimize the opportunity. Avoid situations where people you don’t know will be present and leaving children alone with them.

3.     Stay alert to the signs of sexual abuse. Possible signs: reluctance to go home; secretiveness; nightmares, bedwetting, withdrawn or suddenly aggressive; running away; sexual knowledge beyond their years. See a more complete list at www.loveourchildrenusa.org or www.darkness2light.org.

4.     Educate your children about appropriate sexual behavior and what constitutes unwanted or uncomfortable physical contact. Tell your children what an abuser might say. “This is our little secret. If you tell anyone I will hurt your mom or dog.”

5.     Listen to your children.  Tell them they can come to you and talk about anything.

6.      Make a plan, where to go or who to call or how you will react if your child comes to you.  Check out your local resources.

7.     Challenge the media or advertising when they sexualize children! Write letters, boycott products.

8.     Ask your schools, religious institutions and work what policies and protocols they have in place.

9.     If you suspect child abuse you must report it! Call your local protection agency or the National Abuse Hotline; 1 800 25 ABUSE.

10.  You have the power to end this epidemic of sexual child abuse: Speak out, take action and put children’s safety first. 

What movies have you seen or books have you read that would be a great jumping off place for discussing abuse in your community?